We’ll say this for Kit Harington (Jon Snow): he’s committed to the role that’s dominated his life for nearly a decade. In a sprawling cover story with Variety, the line between the famously brooding Jon Snow and the actor who plays him become blurred, as Harington reflects on the often grueling process of making this show we all love.

But first, let’s talk about season 8. “[HBO] went balls out, I think is the term,” Harington said. “They could have easily set the same budget as they did for Season 7, but they went bigger.”

It’s good to hear that all that effort didn’t go to waste. But let’s get back to the brooding. How was the experience of filming season 8 for Harington?

[The shoot was] in extreme weather and just in heavy fucking costumes. I was there the whole time this year. I felt a bit like people were coming in and out, and Jon Snow was just fucking there the whole time. You have these in-jokes, and these relationships that thrive for eight years. That’s a long time for those jokes to be going, and they never felt old or tired. In the last season, I was like, these are getting tired now. And I think they got tired because we could see the end coming. That’s a way of emotionally detaching from something: relationships very slightly starting to strain, just on the edges, just frayed. Now everyone loves each other again.

Everyone suffered on set so we can be enthralled at home. I’m more pumped for season 8 than ever.

Whatever the difficulties, Harington still admitted to “just blubbing” after filming his final scene as Jon Snow, and this after watching Peter Dinklage “break down” after wrapping on Tyrion Lannister.  “I took off the costume, and it felt like my skin was being peeled away,” he said. “I was very emotional. It felt like someone was shedding me of something.”

[T]he end of Jon’s journey, whatever that may be … I was satisfied with how his story ended.

The same can’t necessarily be said for his performance throughout the series. “Looking back at the entirety of Thrones, there’ll be 70% of the scenes that I’ll just never be happy with,” Harington admitted. “I’ve come to terms with that.” Happily, he seems more steady about season 8. “I know who this is now, and I’m at peace with who this is. I just got a feeling that it’s the most satisfied I will be with my work as Jon Snow.”

Harington’s dissatisfaction with some of his scenes may have to do with the fact that he was going through what sounds like some intense personal struggles while filming them, particularly around the time when everyone was wondering if Jon Snow was really dead after the season 5 finale. “When you become the cliffhanger of a TV show, and a TV show probably at the height of its power, the focus on you is f—ing terrifying,” he said. “You get people shouting at you on the street, ‘Are you dead?’ At the same time you have to have this appearance. All of your neuroses — and I’m as neurotic as any actor — get heightened with that level of focus.”

It wasn’t a very good time in my life. I felt I had to feel that I was the most fortunate person in the world, when actually, I felt very vulnerable. I had a shaky time in my life around there — like I think a lot of people do in their 20s. That was a time when I started therapy, and started talking to people. I had felt very unsafe, and I wasn’t talking to anyone. I had to feel very grateful for what I have, but I felt incredibly concerned about whether I could even fucking act.

And once again, this stress was compounded by the fact that Harington was playing who you could arguably call one of the “main characters” of the series. Yes, Game of Thrones is an ensemble show, but even early on we had a sense that Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen were going to stand tall, and Harington felt that. “My darkest period was when the show seemed to become so much about Jon, when he died and came back. I really didn’t like the focus of the whole show coming onto Jon — even though it was invalidating my problem about being the weak link because things were about Jon.”

And speaking of Daenerys, Emilia Clarke discussed her unique bond with her costar. “Kit and I are counterparts in terms of experience,” Clarke said. “We are pretty much the same age, and our characters have had parallel journeys, and we as actors have had parallel journeys.

We’ve both done stupid action movies we regret and fabulous things we’re proud of, and we’ve always come back to ‘Thrones.’ And he’s the person I’d ask, ‘How are you handling this? Are you alright?’ We were in sync, even if we were filming on opposite sides of the world.

And once they did come together, it sounds like the two of them had a good time. “The first scene we had together, we both just started laughing,” Clarke recalled. “Why are you looking at me this strange way and saying these strange lines? You’re my friend!” Also, apparently Harington would “pretend to retch” during their scenes together. “Oh, my God, mate. You’re not making this any easier!” Nice one Kit.

Harington also sees a lot of parallels between these two characters. “We’re the two young female and male leads, and there’s going to be more pressure on those parts. They’re not your Joffreys; they’re not so showy. And there was a sort of feeling in me, in the middle of when the show was going on: ‘I’d love some sort of character thing.’”

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You can read the full interview here, but here are a few other highlights:

  • On whether Harington would take another Thrones-type role: “It would have to be extraordinarily special, and it would have to shoot here [in London]. I think there’s enough to dip my hand in without doing a six-year marathon.” How about Bodyguard, the series headlined by his former Thrones costar Richard Madden? “That’d be perfect. ‘Bodyguard 2,’ maybe.”
  • On type casting: “I’m not really driven by wanting to play heroes right now. Every script I read at the moment is about characters who are deeply flawed and in some ways antiheroes. And that doesn’t necessarily go along with my casting, so it’s going to take a bit of work to fight against that.”
  • On Jon Snow’s lustrous hair: “For any other job I’ve had up until now, there’s a contractual element over me that I have to return to ‘Thrones’ with a similar look. I can’t tell you the amount of conversations I’ve had with agents about whether my hair’s going to grow back in time.”

Can’t be a Kit Harington interview without a question about his hair. Game of Thrones season 8 premieres April 14.

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